Energy you'd better use for processing your heartbreak and perhaps for finding a new love.
Of course you can talk about your ex, but some things you better don't say.
Here is an overview of what you better not say about your ex.
1. He/she was always broke
Everyone has a different lifestyle and opportunities, and just because he/she could not match yours is no reason to depict him/her as cheap. Don't be hoity-toity just because the other had less to spend or preferred to spend his/her money on other things.
2. Being negative about everything/ only remembering the bad stuff
Even though you are apart now, you do not have to act like everything you shared with each other was stupid. If someone brings up a memory of you two up, take a deep breath to prevent yourself from saying something like "Yes, but do you remember when he/she (and then fill in something terrible)." And especially don't say bad things about your ex in front of a date. He/she can then start to ask temselves if you are truly over your ex.
3. He/she was always an dick/bitch
First one thinks when you say something like that 'why the f * ck were you (as long as) together? Second, if it really was true, you yourself are probably dumber, still being together with such a person after you realized how awful he/she was. If you things like this it only puts you in a bad light. Others will just find you bitter.
4. You still love him/her
If you keep saying that you still love him/her to others, you will suffer longer from the heartbreak. Pretend you're over the other. Preferably say something like: "We had fun together and I wish him/her all the best," even if you mean nothing of it.
5. Telling something shamefull
If you tell some terrible story to others about your ex, think about how this looks to your friends, let alone your new partner? To what extent can they still trust you and besides, how would you find it yourself if your ex tells other about your things?
6. Revealing secrets
Be ethical and don't go revealing secrets from your ex to others, just because your relationship ended in a bad way. You have had an intimate relationship and have shared important things with each other. And if you have promised at those times you'd keep it for yourself, the ending of a relationship does not mean you suddenly can break that promise. Be true to yourself.
7. Brag about the things he/she did
Some people are just the opposite: they eulogize everything their ex did or said. But if you have a new relationship, this can work against you. Your ex belongs to the past, so let it rest. Your new partner should not feel like he/she must compete with someone.
8. How much your parents loved your ex
If you take your new boy/girlfriend to your parents, do not start talking about how crazy your parentswere on your former partner. Your new partner is already nervous enough, so don't make him/her nervous with the feeling that he must compete against your ex.
9. The sex was bad
Unless your ex lay on his back pretending to be dead, don't talk about his/hers bed performances.
10. Comparing bad qualities of your ex with things that your new partner does
If you want to make your new love really upset just say that what he/she does reminds you of the bad qualities of your ex. Such comments will never lead to anything positive.
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